Blogging Without Borders

Blogging: Writing one's thoughts onto a computer screen while sitting somewhere "hip" like a Starbucks or the courtyard of a college campus. Using spare minutes to write whimsical posts about hot topics.

Mom Blogging {AKA blogging with a toddler}: Writing one's toddler sized thoughts onto a computer screen in a toy infested family room, while listening to Daniel Tiger and watching said toddler bang his head on the sofa over and over again, only to have him head bang his way onto the writers lap and slam her laptop shut on her It's-my-day-off-post-baby-boob.

Note to self: Never open laptop while toddler {& ta tas} are roaming wild and free.

Now, four million hours later, with one less lady bit, I can finally start writing. Truth be told, I have approximately five or so blogs that I've written, but left unpublished. I start them all the same--on fire, motivated, completely confident that THIS ladies and gentleman, is THE ONE. The one that bears my heart and soul that I courageously share with friends and family on social media because I love to write.

But then I get too scared after I read it five thousand times and decide that I suck at writing and only two people on earth will read it. I certainly know that at least two people will call me after reading it to profess their love to me and my "wonderful" little blog, which makes me both happy and bang-my-head-against-the-sofa-slam-my-boob-in-a-computer-crazy because only two people read my blog and they happen to be forced to love me because I birthed their grand baby.

Of course I'm being a tiny bit over dramatic, but I am my own worst critic and I over analyze every.single.thing.

There, I said it!

Are there AA meetings for this shiz?

Except maybe it should be called something like "Crazy Mom Writers Anonymous" or "Mad Mom Writers Unite."

I'm fairly positive neither one of those will ever catch on.

Plenty of meaningful ideas beat their wings across my brain, begging to be written, but the FEAR of being so raw and real kills them off in the end.

I adopted a motto in college that I'm sure I've written about before, ironically I'm not sure if it was ever published. I couldn't tell you who said it, but I remember exactly where I was when I heard it and I am certain that I will never forget it.

Never let fear control your life.

Never.

I could name a million times where I've put this motto to work, probably. The ONE time that I have let fear control me, it had to do with my writing. My last semester of college I enrolled in a creative writing course for kicks and giggles. The first time I read my assignment (a short story) to a classmate, I was so terrified that I started trembling. And then I was so embarrassed that I started sweating and I couldn't catch my breath! The funny thing is that I never knew I had weird writer anxiety until I took that class. Over the course of the semester the anxiety faded and I could feel myself becoming a better writer, but it has never gone away.

Writing is and always has been therapeutic for me. It's a way for my soul to say what it has to say and let me make peace with it.

I recently attended a funeral of a college roommate who passed away much too soon. It made me think about what I would leave behind. What pieces of me would be left for my loved ones? What trail am I blazing at this point in life? How would Beckham know me if I left this life too soon?

Pictures and videos are great, but writing is better. Writing brings pictures to life. Writing is what really captures memories and stories. Writing encapsulates a persons soul on paper.

No more fear of writing. No more over analyzation.

Just raw, honest, real writing.

And with that, I'm so excited to start writing about our life and our adventures on a more regular basis. This past year Travis and I have completely changed our lives in some incredible ways. It wasn't easy getting there. Our marriage is stronger than ever and our hearts are over flowing with happiness. I hope that through my writing I can keep everyone up to date and in the loop with our crazy, wonderful life!


Love,
Lindsay